Women with Attention Deficit Disorder: Embracing Disorganization at Home and in the Workplace

If you're ADD like me -- "ADD Like Me" wow, what a great movie title! Sorry; I digress -- anyway, if you are, then you'll be scribbling and underlining like mad all through this book. Sari Solden's fresh perspectives have helped me hop off the Treadmill of Getting Nowhereness that so many women with ADD seem to be on. Her hefty book is packed with eye-opening comments that seem outside the perspectives of most other writers on the general subject of ADD/ADHD. Solden's focus is on the impact of ADD behaviors on others and how this distorts the mirror in which we seek our sense of self. That dynamic translates into an array of family, community, and workplace issues. She provides the reader with why/because insights that, while never condescending, make recognizably clear and tenable what others have only skimmed over in their rush to suggest clever coping mechanisms. These insights have already helped me explain to my own significant others -- those who are still speaking to me, that is! -- how I need to approach life and how they can best accommodate my unique style in return for the many ways in which I go overboard accommodating *them*. This delicate negotiation phase is a tricky one that Solden covers, I believe, too briefly given its importance; this is no mere matter of coping mechanisms. In a future edition, she might want to consider expanding that chapter. While at it, she might make her examples of dialog with significant others a little less stilted -- they're written in classic "Therapese" -- so readers could actually imagine themselves saying such things without dissolving into gales of laughter. On a positive note with respect to that same section, I thank Solden for this candid advice, here paraphrased: Don't go on every chance you get about how you have ADD. It's tedious for others to hear." How blessedly judgmental! That sort of practical advice is rare among medical and mental health professionals, but it absolutely belongs in a discussion of living with ADD. Her follow-up is equally helpful: what others *do* need/want to hear. Solden has the courage to say that living with ADD is never going to be easy. The most elegant strategies can always be confounded and it's best to expect these slip-ups and think of ways ahead of time to manage in spite of them. Other authors on this subject seem to think that once armed with the right prescription medicine, a supply of Post-It notes and a PDA, coping with ADD is a battle won. Those with ADD who believe such facile nonsense are doomed to a life of self-loathing. Solden seems to understand this, and helps readers not only understand, but accept it, too. Women with ADD need to read this book with their pens uncapped, or, if they have moral objections to scribbling in books, a good thick notepad handy. There will be much of value to note, review, and especially *use*, long after the wisdom contained in other books on the subject of ADD has gone to the place where an ADDer's intenti

Funny thing with this book. I did not know anything about it, did not even know that adults could have ADD. I was at the library, and as I was reaching for another book "Women with Attention deficit..." literally fell into my hand. I renewed this book over ten times. I am placing an order to give as Christmas gifts. At the risk of sounding dramatic I must be truthful and say that this book saved my life. I am one of these misdiagnosed women. My therapist was adamant that I do not have ADD. I was hurt by this because I thought he would help me develop what I was learning. I continued applying the lessons without his help. Sari Solden, where have you been all my crazy, disorganized life? I am so grateful for what I learned. Since reading this, I have raised my standards. No more bottom barrel jobs for this woman here. I interview like a pro, I know my gifts now, I can go on and on. I will never go back to what I was, (I do not know how I lived this way for so long) The best thing this wonderful brilliant professional did for me is to help me get over my shame about my so called secret. I love myself. I am a single mother, and my kids do not recognize me now. I am a wonderful, creative, assertive, organized, efficient, smart, beautiful, superduper black sister now! Thanks Ms.Solden. I just want you to know that I pray for you and ask God to continue blessing you for your bringing this much needed hope and empowerment to ADD women.