Caregiving: Hospice-Proven Techniques for Healing Body and Soul

I wish I would have known about this book over five years ago when my father first became ill and my mother, then 79, started the long process of taking care of him before he died last August. Not living in the same area I could only imagine how difficult it must have been for her. It would have been reassuring for her to know that what she was doing to support my father were the right things. Oftentimes the outstanding efforts of those who care for the dying are not appreciated. Instead they frequently feel guilty that they have not done enough. I can honestly say my mother did the best job she (or anyone for that matter) could have done to help her dying husband. The title of the book is so appropriate too and the respect and sensitivity the author has for the dying cannot be overstated. The chapter titles themselves speak of the rights that dying individuals have such as the Right to Be In Control, The Right to Have a Sense of Purpose, The Right to Know the Truth, The Right to be Comfortable, The Right to Touch and Be Touched, The Right to Laughter, The Right to Cry and Express Anger, The Right to Explore the Spirtual and The Right to Have a Sense of Family. It is only now, ten months after my father's death, can I deeply appreciate how much my mother respected my own father's rights. For instance, however painful it was for all of us to see my father pass away in a hospital bed in his home, it was HIS wish to die at home surrounded by family members who loved him with all our hearts. Even though he had a "regular job" he held for many years, my father enjoyed painting abstracts in his off time. When EMS delivered him to his home, one of the last times he opened his eyes was to see his canvases surrounding him in his living room. It was one of the last times this gregarious man smiled. (The last time was the following day just four days before he went to be with the Lord. My brother and I had the privilege of seeing his eyes for the last time). In another instance, my mother respected how deeply religious my father was and had a priest come visit him in the hospital to give him last rites. I had been in the hospital before when priests came to visit my father and had seen how comforting that was for him. I knew this final time meant a great deal to him. I found this book to be written very much in touch with helping caring family members as well as for hospice staff that might visit someone in his home. Many people are not aware that hospice workers do not just take care of dying people in hospice centers. There is home based care available also and these people are like ministering angels. They took such loving care of my father in his final days. As a social worker of 29 years I would recommend this book not only to family members but to helping professionals who work with the dying such as social workers, nurses, doctors, chaplains, doctors, etc. It is a Godsend!